Personal Thought: On Having Style
I think having personal style is one of the most important things as a person, especially as a creator or a creative person. Having style is something that is not taught in school or in formal education. Yet when someone has style, you know it immediately when you see it. It’s mysterious, unique, and ethereal, but totally present when it’s the real deal. Being stylish can come in many forms, even though it’s often attributed to how one dresses. Beyond just fashion, style can be expressed in how a person speaks, thinks, moves, writes, builds, etc. Moreover, being very good at one’s vocation and doing things that others can’t do is one of the best ways to have a personal style or as they say in business lingo “having a brand.” This is something that I have over the course of my life gained a lot of experience with. For me it’s always been most important to express myself, because I want my true authentic self being put out into the world. It’s often not easy and you suffer from judgement and others’ misunderstandings, but that’s the price to pay for being a trendsetter. Here are five lessons on how to develop your own unique style in whatever that you do:
“Expose yourself to the best things that humans have done and then try to bring those things into what you are doing.” - Steve Jobs
To have style, one has to be open-minded to human greatness and learn from the experiences of others. The truth is, we are all learning from each other. It’s easy to learn from people that you like or hold in high esteem, but it’s much harder to learn from people that have totally different views or lifestyles from your own. The latter is where we can grow the most. The key is to accept all ideas, and evaluate them rationally for the true merits of the idea. Keep only the ideas that make sense to you, discard the ideas that don’t make sense after a careful evaluation, and then try to incorporate the sifted ideas into your mindset. This is the kernel and kindling for developing a personal style: being open-minded.
“In order to be irreplaceable, one must always be different.” - Coco Chanel
Next to being open-minded, one must have the courage to think uniquely. After learning so many lessons from others, your mind will want to start doing its own thing. At some point it becomes less important to learn from others and more important to think independently. The transition from learning from your parents, teachers, friends, role models, heroes, etc. and choosing to do your own thing is not easy. This is where judgement and harsh criticism may come, but don’t lose faith. If you know what you are doing is expressing your true authentic self to the world, then that’s what builds confidence. The confidence to think new thoughts and combine existing ideas into totally new ideas breeds more creativity and authentic self-expression. A person starts becoming truly unstoppable when their confidence and creative self-expression start reinforcing each other. It only grows stronger over time!
“Aim for the moon and if you miss, you’ll land among the stars.” - American Proverb
After cultivating your own thoughts, one must translate thoughts into action and don’t limit your imagination! A lot of work goes into the two aforementioned bullet points, but the magic happens when you express yourself through action. When you totally believe what you are doing and you don’t fear the consequences of whether you win, lose, or draw, then that can create a truly unique brand that draws others to you. If you feel too timid or scared about the outcomes, push through anyway. Why not? It’s a good life lesson regardless of the outcome, no? Never, ever limit yourself and think small. Thinking big and removing all mental limitations will translate into actions that seem supernatural to others. Weigh the risks, but never be afraid to think big and take big swings. Most people are afraid of taking big action because they are afraid of what they could lose. But why limit yourself to a predefined destiny that’s probably false? You are far more capable than you think!
“An eagle does not catch flies.” - Italian Proverb
Once you have developed a personal style, you will draw people to you as well as repel others away from you; accept it and embrace it. An interesting phenomenon happens to all creators after creating for a while: you’ll start drawing people to you who really like you. At the same time: your style and brand will drive others away from you because they really don’t like you. That’s actually totally expected! Ironically, people with a strong personality are often not liked until a long time has passed or until after they are dead. That’s when their influence increases exponentially far more than when they were alive. Navigating love and hate is the price that one has to pay in order to make a big splash and have outsized influence in this world. Stay cool and calm, and never lose faith. Stay the course and remember that you have bigger plans and action items to work through on the agenda. Don’t be dragged into petty drama or anything that detracts you from your mission. Just keep going!
“I think the definition of greatness is to inspire the people next to you.” - Kobe Bryant, R.I.P
After reaching the influence stage, try to use your influence for good and help other people! Don’t try to get famous or try to make others respect you. Be yourself and be a force of good in the world. Stay confident as well as humble and spread what you’ve learned over your life to other people. Maybe it helps them, maybe it doesn’t but the key is to keep trying to be a light for others; hopefully you’ll lead others in a way where they don’t make the same mistakes that hampered you. That’s the ultimate blessing, knowing that through your actions it has made life easier for the person that comes after you. When someone has worked hard and ensured that others are blessed, that person can rest at night with peace and joy, even though they may be devastatingly exhausted. The effort and sacrifice is totally worth it!
This was just a random thought I had in the middle of the night haha. Right now it’s Saturday, 9/27/25 @ 2:42 AM EDT, and I’m going to sleep!